Leading Effective Small Groups in Youth Ministry
Editor’s note: Ministry takes place in a variety of settings: one-on-one, small groups, large groups, camps/retreats. Each contributes differently to a students’s spiritual growth and brings different challenges, too. This month’s series “Contexts of Discipleship” will help you think through the ways you can better understand your context in order to disciple youth into lifelong faith.
Small group discussions are an important part of discipleship. They can be spaces that offer accountability, foster community, and help students grow together in their knowledge of the Bible. When we think about what our small group discussions should look like, youth leaders should remember two key questions: what’s the goal and how should we structure them accordingly?
What Do Small Group Discussions Accomplish?
When leading a small group, you must have a goal in mind. The goal of all small groups should be meeting students where they are and sharing the Word on a more personalized level. As you are crafting your small groups for the week, be sure to keep in mind the various maturity levels and contexts that your students are coming from. The opportunity for intentionality and specificity are what make a small group such a good place for discipleship; students can begin to apply truths to their current situations.
In small groups, youth leaders can utilize small group guides as prompts for discussion, where you can give specific instructions that are contextualized based on the dynamics of each group. For example, when talking about gender and sexuality in our most recent “Disciple Now” event, our small groups were tailored to student maturity levels; they were lighter for middle schoolers and more mature for high schoolers. Paul is an excellent example of this, since he often tailored His teachings to the understanding of His audience, becoming “all things to all people” by finding gospel on-ramps for each group he spoke to. A good approach is keep the discussions specific, intentional, and personal.
How Do I Organize Small Groups for My Church?
Making sure your groups have the right makeup is important. The size of groups matters; if it is too large, then it can feel like the “small” group no different than your “large” group. Every church is different, but try to make it to where there are at most 12 students in the group. In some cases, to reach those smaller numbers, you may want to consider separating them by gender. If your context is an even larger one, then you may need to also move to middle school and high school groups based on gender. If the groups are still too large, then you could look at doing it by grade. I have known some contexts who do two groups and others who do nine or more. Do what works best for your students! Separating them well allows for leaders to be more specific, intentional, and personal.
Ensuring that there are always at least two adult leaders in each small group is not only responsible from an accountability standpoint, but it also allows for someone else to offer new, fresh insights. It can be easy for conversation to hit a lull or go off track, which makes having another leader in the room to help keep the conversation on track a huge help.
Do’s and Dont’s of Small Group Discussions
DON’T…Let that stubborn kid just sit in the corner. Get your “outskirt” kids involved. We all know a student who never seems to get engaged or answer a question. However, sometimes, our perception of these students doesn’t match reality. Often, those kids are listening, and they can even answer many of the questions you throw their way. They may be looking for ways to get involved in the conversation, but they don’t know how. Simply asking what they think in a small group context might open them up to more conversations.
DON’T…Limit your small group leaders to just adults. Use your small groups to deploy student leaders. After all, equipping believers to serve is also a part of discipleship. Jesus sent his disciples to make disciples (Matthew 28:19-20). Do the same with the students in your student ministry! For those students who show spiritual maturity in small group discussions, consider deploying them to be co-leaders in groups.
DON’T…Make it as serious as large group. Keep it light, but on topic! Sometimes, it may seem like the discussion is going down a rabbit trail, but if the students are making biblical connections, let them make connections! Be quick to pull it back on track if you sense that you are losing the conversation to outside topics, but remember one of the points of small groups is to help students connect what they are learning to their current situations.
DO…Ask good questions. Although “Jesus” is always the answer, as my students remind me, make sure to ask more than surface-level questions. Move away from the informational questions with only one answer, and push students to think critically through the questions you ask. Jesus often asked good questions in His ministry (Matthew 16:15). Here is a line of questions that I have found helpful:
Where are we in the story? This question forces the students to recall the context of the passage you are discussing. Because context determines meaning, this is one that I go back to regularly.
What is happening? This allows the students to put the text in their own words. As the leader, you can begin to then ask questions that guide the discussion in the direction you want it to go.
What does this passage tell the reader about God? I always like to see what students say to this question, as they can give you a glimpse into things the student is seeing in their own lives.
What does God want me to do/know based on this passage? This is your classic application question. This is where you can have a call to action. You may even ask, “How can I (insert application point here) this week?”
DO… give the students time to respond. This is one of the mistakes that I can fall into if I do not catch myself. Before I know it, I have answered all of my own questions because I fear the awkward silence. It is important to realize that sometimes, awkward silence is better than not allowing students to think and respond on their own time.
DO… keep an open line of communication with other leaders. Other leaders, especially those “seasoned veterans of the faith,” can pass along wisdom to you about how to lead small group discussions. In some cases, they may have been leading small group discussions for longer than we have been alive! Keeping an open line of communication with other leaders about better ways to engage students, who is leading the group for the week, and good questions to ask.